Rocket Surgeon: A person with less-than-stellar aptitude. A mixture of "rocket scientist" and "brain surgeon" This phrase describes a person who is neither.




Monday, September 13, 2010

A Disgusting Story

I've discovered my purpose in life is to educate all the other dudes in the world, not counting myself,  about a cowboy's life.  If you can't handle a little pus and blood, not puss in boots, but pus in blood, you might want to quit reading now.  But if I can take it, by golly, you can too!

Being a cowboy isn't just about looking cool in chaps and spurs.  That's what I used to think too.
But, sometimes they have to work.
And sometimes this work is quite unappealing.

Take this for example.

This is a bull.

And he's got a problem.

He's got an abscess on his jaw.  

An abscess that needs to be drained.

And I know just the cowhand to handle such a job.

Not only is this abscess uncomfortable and painful, well it's ugly.  And just how is this bull supposed to catch a cow with an ugly mug like this?  You just answer me that, why don't cha?


Jason pens him and pushes him into a squeeze chute which basically squeezes him tight so he can't kick, fling, fight, maim or kill us.


He gets stabbed with a pocket knife, and doesn't even wince.
Don't say I didn't warn you.  It's only going to get worse from here on out.

The abscess begins to drain.

And drain some more, and more, and more.

The bull can very easily swing his head around and be very unpredictable, possibly smashing Jason's fingers. This string of pus is also very unpredictable when the bull flings his head. You don't want to be standing in the wrong place when six inches of gunk begins to sail across the sky. Trust me on this one.
 So Jason gets a nose ring and uses it to pull the bull's head to the side.  It was my job to keep his head to the side by pulling on this chain with a nose ring on the end, stuck in a bull's nose. I had to look away as Jason continued to squeeze and stab the abscess. 

I just needed to break away from this story to show a pretty picture for a moment.  I think we all needed a diversion don't you?

Okay back to the gore.


Jason continued with this madness until most of the filling was drained out, but it was still huge.  He did all he could do for this fellow, then sprayed him down with wound medicine and iodine for healing.

You're free to go #779.  Please remain calm and continue forward.  Do not, I repeat, do not turn around and charge at us. 


This is not a Texas murder scene.


Another pretty picture.

Hopefully you can erase all those horrific images from your minds. 

Have a good day!

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