Rocket Surgeon: A person with less-than-stellar aptitude. A mixture of "rocket scientist" and "brain surgeon" This phrase describes a person who is neither.




Monday, May 10, 2010

Festivities Abound

Happy Day After Mother's Day.
I went to church and was fed breakfast by men.
Don't let anyone tell you that childbirth is necessary to relish the perks of Mother's Day.

I've discovered that Mother's Day is an awkward day.  It's a day that people tend to feel sorry for me because I'm childless. I sense pity vibes all around.  But please don't feel sorry for me.  I'm a non-mother by choice.  And it will suit me fine to live without any lecture right now if you are hankering to give me one.  Please.  I've heard them all, "Whose going to take care of you when you're old?"  "You'll never truly know what love is" "Having kids is the greatest joy."  "The pleasures outweigh the heartaches"  Blah, blah, blah.


Last year I was honored at church on Mother's Day.  My niece secretly wrote a letter, not on her own accord, but because she was asked.  Then the pastor read it aloud without saying who it was addressed to, and I was called forced to the platform with Ashlynn.  I wasn't the only one who was honored of course, and it was kind of fun to try to figure out for whom each letter was written.  Here's my letter.  I have it hanging in my bedroom:

Tribute to Angel Wheeler
Even though you're not my mom, I think of you as a mom.  You spend time with me and love me in a way that only a mom can.  You always play Wii with me and let my friends come over.  And sometimes, you even let me have a sleepover, but I only get to invite one friend.  If I have trouble with my math homework, you always help me because you know it gets really frustrating.  You are so smart.  I really like the way you get me to church on time, unlike my dad who is slow as Christmas.  Thank you for all you do for me.  I owe you a debt I could never repay.  I love you extra, extra much!!  Love,
Ashlynn

It was extremely touching and my eyes stung with tears.  Not only that, but my cousin had been killed the day before and my heart was gaping and raw.  I surmised the letter was for me when she got to the "sleepover with one friend" part.  I can't handle a bunch of wild kids.  But I'll have you know that we had a real sleepover last weekend with 3 friends.  That's right, three!  1-2-3   It was a birthday party sleepover.  I'm not too much into kids keeping me up all night, so I plotted a perfect plan.  I stuck them in the backyard in a little outhouse/building/shed that we have with food, drink, and activities. 

First, I made a few rules, because I'm a teacher that's why.  And children need boundries, very tight ones.   Then, I hung them on their door.



When you use a lot of colors, kids think rules are fun. 
I think. 
Maybe.
Well, maybe not.

 They didn't keep the "lights out by 2:30 a.m." rule.  When Jason got up at 5:00 to go to work, they were still up. 

And I do realize that it says "only come in the big house"  because I like to pretend I live in a mansion.  Sometimes I push a pretend button at the supper table to talk to Jason in a speaker.  I pretend he's at the other end of a fancy banquet table, waaaay down there. Really he's right beside me, so close I can jab his hand with my fork, which I do on occasion.  But it's fun for me.  I push the button and bend closely, "Jason, will you please pass the butter?" 
Self amusement, people.   If I don't do it, nobody else will.

Maybe karaoke is misspelled on the rule chart too, but I was too lazy to look it up for a bunch of eleven year olds who probably couldn't read it anyway.

Karaoke, crafts, Wii, dancing, music, snacks, and games all night long.

Fun was had by all, including me, who got a full 8 hours of sleep. 
Nyquil---the so you can rest during a sleepover medicine.

I'm all ready to do it again.
In about 6 more years. 

Sleepover = Success!

3 comments:

Christy said...

oh no...did I rub off on you with the multi colored markers/pens??? :)

Angel said...

Ha! I'm afraid you've rubbed off on me in more ways than that!

Anonymous said...

that letter reeks of anniebelle.